Everybody's doing it, so why the hell should I?

One gal's journey into discovering her sexuality

(Haters need not apply.)

Hey everyone!

Just an average gal here. Nothing special.
This will basically be a blog for me to feel out things I'm not comfortable putting on my main.

For the brave of heart: Strap yourselves in. It's gonna be a bumpy ride.


Now think of how many of those female characters and protagonists are oversexed, created for the male gaze, or put in an inactive damsel role for the plot of the game. Representation matters. A Study last year proved that exposure to tv shows increased the self esteem of young white boys and markedly decreased the confidence and self esteem of girls across the board (and we haven’t even started on the representation of characters of color and the effect it has on children’s self perception). 

Video games are a different media, and even more concerning if representation metrics are changing how our kids think of themselves. Especially knowing that 67% of American Households have video game consoles and 91% of Children play video games regularlyhow do you think the portrayal (and lack of portrayals) of women and girls in these games is affecting little girls – or influencing how little boys view their importance and/or influence over them? 

Comics. Movies. Lit. Pop Culture. The Smash Survey is an upcoming podcast project that will critically explore the representation of race, gender, and queer identity in media and pop culture in a fun and engaging format. 



Lettuce Bacon Green beans Tomato Ally sandwich 



it pisses me off so much when people are like ‘you don’t need labels, just be yourself!’

did you have to pull yourself apart in order to figure out what the fuck was wrong with you and why you weren’t like everyone else


give me a teen romcom about a cute asexual couple who fall in love and help each other realize they aren’t broken and eventually get married and live a lovely life together watching anime and eating cake and adopting children

Something you do does not negate something you are.

My friend at our weekly Ace meetup, when talking about the absurdity of saying someone’s sexual or romantic history defines the orientation they’re “allowed” to identify as (an ace in a sexual relationship, a bisexual in a hetero relationship, etc.)     


Martini Aces T-shirt~

All Aces Cards T-shirt~



1. asexual people can want to have sex for reasons other than sexual attraction and it doesn’t make them any less asexual. some reasons include:

  • they enjoy sexual activity / want to experience sexual pleasure
  • their partner wants to and they’re totes cool with it (not being coerced or feeling obligated to)
  • reproduction

2. asexual people can want to NOT have sex for any reason and it doesn’t make them any more or less deserving of attention and respect than sexually active asexuals. it is not a competition, people do not exist to fit or defy stereotypes.

Sassy ace comebacks


"You’ve just never had me. Because, you know, size matters."
"Perhaps you’re right. Maybe I do need to start small."


"Do you masturbate?"
"Not to the thought of you.


"You’re just depressed."
"How can I not be when I look at you?”


"Don’t you ever have sex?"
"I was with your mom just last night."


"Asexuals aren’t real."
"Yes, I am only a figment of your delusional imagination. And you’re still talking to me."


"You probably just can’t get any."
"Now, don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re not that ugly. Oh, wait, who are we talking about?”


"You just haven’t tried sex."
"You just haven’t tried holding your breath for an hour. I hear it’s really great."


"You should get your hormones checked.”
"You should have your doctor check and see what that gross thing is on your face. Oh, wait, that is your face. Sorry!”


"Aren’t you a little old to be a virgin?"
"No, I lost my virginity ages ago with a guy named None of Your Damned Business."


"Ugh, I’d die if I was like that."
"What’s stopping you now?"


"That’s not even what ‘asexual’ means."
"Sure it is. Check the dictionary. It’s a few pages before ‘asshole’ and ‘assumption.’"



Good for you vancouver. These ads have really been pissing me off, particularly since they’re more common close to the UBC campus. Yesterday is saw one where some one had put some white tape over the “‘t” - but this is even better.


Good for you vancouver. These ads have really been pissing me off, particularly since they’re more common close to the UBC campus. Yesterday is saw one where some one had put some white tape over the “‘t” - but this is even better.

evilangel198 replied to your post: My mother’s stopped insisting that I g…

It’s still progress though right? Maybe she will continue to become more accepting as time goes on.

Thanks! That’s my hope!

From the stories I’ve heard from my parents, I’ve had my suspicions that my mother might be at least gray-asexual. Sometimes I wonder if that might be why she was so insistent about it being a medical issue because she doesn’t want to see that reflection?? But who knows?

For now, she’s progressing, slowly but still. Here’s to hoping for forward progress in the future!